It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Randomize
