I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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