there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Randomize
