had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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