What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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