Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
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