oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I think I won the penis lottery.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
Randomize
