I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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