What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
