I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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