YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize