it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
i came on her dog
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
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