Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Is this like a preordered booty call?
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize
