so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Randomize
