mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
God I need to hump something, right now.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
