he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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