hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Sorry about my life...
Randomize
