Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
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