yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Randomize