So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
