I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
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