So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.�
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
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