yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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