it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Randomize
