we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
