the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Randomize
