Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
