I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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