His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
