He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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