Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
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