My cat gives me a boner
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
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