a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
