who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Randomize
