You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
COCAINE IS GR8
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
