Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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