remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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