I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
