My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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