shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I need to wash the frat house off of me
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