Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
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