God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Randomize
