is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
She announced her abortion via fbk
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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