That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Randomize
