She's JV to your varsity
it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Randomize
