oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
