let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Randomize
