this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
Randomize
