I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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