is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I got inside last night via doggy door
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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